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Paolo Sturgesaurus

Athlete of the Century

    Paolo was born in 1951 to a struggling family in Harlem, and attended local public schools during most of his formative years.  Paolo was apparently destined for a foodservice career, as he was always fascinated by the lovely large cafeteria ladies in their sexy hair nets.  In his off hours Paolo practiced diving in the nearby sewage treatment plant.

(click here to see Paolo...far left...as a child)

    Paolo later attended college at the South Haven Community College and Wrecking Yard.  As you may have guessed, his major was Foodservice, with a minor in Grease Trap Maintenance.  Paolo's college years were financed in part with a $150.00 scholarship in "Ethnic Diving."

(click here to see Paolo in college)

    After college Paolo took up collecting aluminum cans along Highway 50 near Ocean City, Maryland, but when the Russian Mafia stepped into the aluminum recycling business Paolo was forced to look elsewhere.  Kraft Foodservice's open door beckoned young Sturgesaurus, and he began peddling food up and down the streets of Cleveland.  Paolo's first objective was to save up enough money to buy a car, as running his route on a motorcycle was somewhat less than convenient.

(click here to see Paolo as an early DSR)

    After a fortuitous day that involved getting a free Coke in the Kraft vending machine, Paolo was lucky enough to stumble on a pile of incriminating photographs of various executives:  his career has since skyrocketed.  Paolo settled in Galt, California, and currently resides in a spacious single-wide mobile home near the noted journalist Mary Beth Sauerstein.

    Paolo's interest in competitive diving was restored when an off-duty police officer discovered Paolo peering through a recently drilled hole in the wall adjoining the Galt High School Girl's Locker Room and the perky Paolo quickly explained that he was interested in teaching young people to become Olympic Divers.

 (Paolo at work) (Click on image to see Paolo on the Golf Course)

(click to see Paolo on vacation)  (click to see Paolo and an unidentified friend)

(click to see Paolo relaxing after a hard day's work)

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